Missouri is part of what we Americans call the “Midwest.” It used to be the “West” back when pioneers started pushing away from the Atlantic and toward the Pacific. Somewhere along the route from being “West” to “Midwest” that burning spirit died off. Well, not entirely. A few hot coals were left behind and—no thanks to my folks—I was one of them.
I never liked windmills and white picket fences. While other little Missouri girls studied for their M.R.S. degree, I let my imagination run wild, chasing after butterflies and the promises of new horizons.
That pushback to the stifling conditions of my childhood was preparing me for something, though I wasn’t sure what. First I bucked the trend by rejecting out of hand being someone’s “better half” and living a life as “the little woman” who hung laundry, bounced babies, and canned pickles. I got myself involved in the business world, which was enough to raise eyebrows back on the farm. Problem is, there is quite a long distance between the upper eyelid and the hairline, and I managed to push the eyebrows even higher. Yes, I could just imagine what the Ladies League must have been saying about Little Barb and her big city ideas…
I finally found my stride when I became co-creator of Sandstone Foundation. To do that meant this rolling stone had to get rid of any remaining moss. It challenged my every thought and belief system. It was the re-making of Barbara and required me to tear down the retaining walls in my brain that contained so much old programming nonsense. At times the stimulation was overwhelming. Never did I consider myself a radical person. If anything I always felt conservative and had my share of commonsense. My focus was to understand myself and grow into a spectacular “human-being.” My late partner, John, dedicated himself to guiding me to be more human. Now, just let me say that was a big task to correct my alienated soul along with my rowdy rebel nature.
Forty five years ago when many of us first embraced change we were all in uncharted waters. I say thanks to Timothy Leary and friends for their brave march to a new consciousness. We explored ourselves in depth and became certified change agents. Every day with the Sandstone philosophy in tow, we were on a “mission impossible” task. Whoever, came into contact with us changed! Sometime changes registered positive and some showed their destructive nature depending on what was programmed into those retaining walls of their brain.
Soon after the happenings at Sandstone flooded the airwaves we received several phone calls from a Baptist minister advising us that we would burn in hell if we didn’t stop what we were doing. Now bear in mind that the Sandstone setting was private and secluded. We were not in the public’s face. He said there was not a place for sinners like us on the planet.
Well, John invited him to come up to Sandstone and have a fireside chat. The minister readily agreed to do so. After all someone needed to offer us salvation. All the community family members disappeared, leaving just the minister and John to their conversation. The minister was not prepared for such a beautiful Sandstone natural setting for starters. Walking into our warmly decorated living room, which could have been any millionaire’s abode, chilled him out. He sat down on the velvet couch and sort of deflated. Without a doubt, John explained that our course of action was needed for humanity and sexual freedom. When it was time for the minister to leave he shook John’s hand and felt the warmth and sincerity of his explanation and left with the understanding that Sandstone needed to be for the welfare of all. Guess he was satisfied since we never heard from this minister again.
At this moment, we are on the brink of the “last frontier”, exploring our Inner self. If we want to create great relationships we need to allow each other freedom. I have lost my partner but my life continues in an extraordinary fashion. The new meditation system that I use, and is used by many others around the world makes inner discovery and change easier than ever.